Ripples
The Break Free Newsletter - Edition #70
Toss a stone into a still pond and watch the water ripple.
One action.
Then a reaction.
Ripples.
Nature reminds us that every cause has an effect.
The same principle plays out in our lives.
Every decision sends ripples outward.
Some build stronger relationships, healthier habits, and deeper peace.
Others can erode them.
Looking back, I can trace my life through those ripples.
The good.
The bad.
The ugly.
Some decisions brought opportunities I never imagined.
Others carried consequences I never saw coming.
None of them existed in isolation.
Each one became the cause of another reaction.
When I reflect on the most painful chapters of my life, I keep coming back to something Dr. Gabor Maté said about addiction…
![ADDICTION, ENFANCE ET TRAUMAS - GABOR MATÉ [ENG-FRENCH SUBS]](https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!VGp1!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F212a9ae6-ab76-4650-844d-78bf388a6295_1280x720.jpeg "ADDICTION, ENFANCE ET TRAUMAS - GABOR MATÉ [ENG-FRENCH SUBS]")
Want to hear the full context?
Dr. Gabor Maté explains his definition of addiction far better than I ever could. I highly recommend taking a few minutes to watch this clip before continuing.
I think about this often and frequently come back to this description of addiction whenever I’m podcasting.
I believe many people misunderstand pornography because they view it primarily as a sexual act, a way to satisfy the male sex drive.
While sexuality is certainly part of it, I think that’s an incomplete picture.
More often than not, porn becomes a form of relief and born as a solution of escaping something.
From my experience with my story it can frequently come from childhood traumas unresolved and can show up as triggers throughout our daily life.
The “solution” can become intertwined in our emotions and our reactions to them.
Like…
A way to numb stress.
To hide from loneliness.
To avoid anxiety.
To quiet shame.
To distract from boredom.
To temporarily forget the pain we don’t know how to carry.
That’s why I think Gabor Maté’s definition is so powerful.
It shifts the conversation away from sex and toward suffering.
The behavior becomes less about pursuing pleasure and more about seeking relief.
The tragedy is that the very thing we reach for to escape our pain often becomes the thing that multiplies it.
That was certainly true in my own life.
Porn never solved the pain I was trying to outrun.
It magnified it.
Every escape carried a cost, sending ripples through my relationships, my integrity, my past relationships, and ultimately the man I was becoming.
As you go through the next few days, think about the stones you choose to cast into the pond and the ripples they’ll create.
Every thought.
Every glance.
Every habit.
Every decision.
They all move outward.
Ripples.
Your actions matter, even when your subconscious tries to justify them, minimize them, or convince you that “this one doesn’t count.”
Every stone creates a ripple.
And the question is…
What kind of wake are you leaving behind?
Keep Fighting The Good Fight.
Break Free. Be Free. Stay Free.
If you have found value in this newsletter - consider subscribing for free encouragement, leaving it a like and even a share with someone you care about. If you’d like to support my publication and mission, consider a donation or a paid PFM Patron subscription.
The more who know, the more we grow together towards breaking free.
Also, if you have encouragement and empowerment that you are willing to share, consider connecting with me for a guest spotlight or guest podcast. The door is open for collaboration and building a community of people who are tired of the status quo, those who choose rebellion over submission.
Much love,
Mac
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