Freedom in Christ
Starting 2025 Fresh with Grace and Purpose | Creation Awaits
This article is a guest post from
of , hosted by Porn-Free Millennial. I hope to bring a message of hope for those who are struggling with pornography addiction. Through this collaboration, Creation Awaits and Porn-Free Millennial hope to enrich your understanding of God’s grace for you. Be sure to read Porn-Free Millennial’s post on the Creation Awaits Substack.The new year symbolizes fresh beginnings and the hope for change. For many, it’s a time to evaluate what holds us back and make resolutions to pursue a better version of ourselves. Among the most difficult chains to break is the grip of pornography. It promises satisfaction but delivers shame, isolation, and broken relationships. As someone who spent 30 years bound by addiction—including pornography—I understand the struggle profoundly. Yet, I also stand as a testimony to the freedom and transformation found in Christ.
This year, let’s resolve to start anew, stepping into a life free from the chains of pornography. Through my personal story and biblical encouragement, I’ll outline the destructive effects of pornography, the joy of a life without it, and the grace of God that empowers real and lasting change.
My Journey: From Addiction to Freedom
For 20 years, I lived a secret life of addiction, beginning at the age of 15. My vices included drugs, alcohol, food, tobacco, and pornography. I was consumed by a need for escape and validation, yet each addiction only deepened my pain and isolation.
My breaking point came during a suicide attempt at the age of 35. My life was in shambles—broken relationships, secret sins, and a failing sense of purpose left me hopeless. In my despair, I cried out to God. Though I had walked far from Him, He met me with open arms.
The day I gave my life to Jesus, my drug addiction completely vanished. The power of His Spirit broke through years of bondage in an instant. Over a short period of time, He healed me of my other addictions: food, alcohol, and tobacco. Yet, pornography proved to be the strongest chain of bondage. For five years, even as I followed Christ, I struggled with shame and secrecy, hiding my addiction from my wife.
Our breakthrough came during a marriage conference where I was convicted to confess my addiction. To my amazement, my wife forgave me. We sought therapy together and began rebuilding our relationship. Through biblical counseling, accountability, and the grace of God, I found freedom. Today, I live free from pornography, and my life is a testimony to the power of God’s grace and the joy of restoration.
Life with Porn: Three Destructive Effects
1. Shame and Isolation
Pornography thrives in secrecy, creating a cycle of shame that drives us further from connection with others and with God. Secrets put the bullets in the enemy’s gun. The act of hiding our sin isolates us, making us feel unworthy of love and incapable of change. I remember the heavy burden of living a double life, presenting a facade to the world while being enslaved by sin. The shame was suffocating, and it kept me from seeking the help I desperately needed. If I only knew that on the other side of confession was freedom.
The devil has no power. Let me say that again: the devil has no power. He only has the power that we give him. Jesus called Satan the “Father of Lies” and the Apostle John called Satan the “Accuser of the Brethren.” Satan uses his network of spiritual powers to deceive and harass the world with lies. The shame of our unconfessed sin binds us in a cycle of accusation and torment from the forces of spiritual darkness. Freedom from this cycle is found when we confess our sin, bondage is found in the grave of shame and secrecy.
2. Distorted Relationships
Pornography warps our understanding of intimacy and love, reducing relationships to selfish gratification. It teaches us to objectify others, eroding trust and authenticity. In my marriage, this distortion was devastating. My addiction made it impossible to form a deep, vulnerable connection with my wife. Instead of drawing closer, we drifted apart, and our relationship suffered greatly.
Every person is a child of God created in His image. When we objectify others for our own sexual gratification, we dehumanize them and reduce them to a tool for our own deviant use. This mars the image of God within you. We are created to be image-bearers of God in this world. This is a witness to the world of who God is. Whenever you give yourself over to your lusts and objectify others, others see a distorted image of God in you. This cripples your witness to the world of the gospel of Jesus Christ.
3. Spiritual Distance
The most heartbreaking effect of pornography is the way it dulls our sensitivity to God’s presence. Sin separates us from Him—not because He withdraws, but because we hide in shame. During my years of addiction, I avoided prayer and Scripture, convinced that I was unworthy of God’s love. The enemy used my sin to whisper lies of condemnation, keeping me trapped.
Perpetual sin begins to erode the fabric of your faith. When you hear stories on the Bible of people receiving healing from Jesus by request and it being granted. You start to wonder why you are not being healed. I know this first-hand. I begged God to take my pornography addiction away. I started to question whether or not I was even saved. “Wouldn’t God withhold healing from a sinful person?” I thought. Perhaps, there is something wrong with me.
Satan uses this fear and doubt to make the separation even deeper driving a wedge between you and God in your heart. Makes sense, doesn’t it? The devil again has no power, so instead he uses your power to create a feedback loop of condemnation so that you are in charge of your own destruction. Clever.
Life Without Porn: Three Transformations
1. Freedom and Joy
Breaking free from pornography brought a profound sense of freedom and joy. No longer burdened by shame, I was able to step into the light and experience the peace that comes from living in integrity. The joy of freedom is indescribable—it’s like breathing fresh air after years of suffocation.
This freedom is only found in confession. Holding on to the secrets is an act of idol worship with the idol being you. It is making an agreement with hell that you are a better protector of yourself than God is. This gives the devil a foothold in your life. The truth is: God is your only protector, any self-protection is sinful. Instead, we must submit to God (agree with his truth), then we can resist the devil and he will flee from us (James 4:7).
2. Restored Relationships
Healing from pornography restored my marriage. Confessing my addiction was terrifying, but it opened the door to forgiveness and trust. My wife’s grace mirrored God’s grace, and together we rebuilt what had been broken. Today, our relationship is stronger than ever, rooted in vulnerability, honesty, and mutual respect.
My newfound integrity with my wife allowed us to start healing from the wounds of both of our pasts. These were the wounds that drove me to medicate my pain through pornography in the first place. There is a scar from the wounds and there always will be. The scar is a reminder of the wound and it would be cruel for God to take this away from us. The scars give our life meaning and purpose through overcoming suffering. I believe this is why after Jesus was resurrected, he still retained the scars from his crucifixion. I believe we will also have scars on our resurrected bodies.
The other restored relationship that comes on the other side of confession is: your relationship to the world. Those of the opposite sex around you are no longer sexual objects for your gratification, but they are children of God with lives of meaning and purpose. Now, you can minister to them if needed or fellowship with them without your sin marring the image of God within you. This takes time to heal like everything else, but eventually the wounds heal.
3. Closeness with God
Freedom from addiction revitalized my spiritual life. Instead of avoiding God, I now run to Him with confidence, knowing that His grace is sufficient. Romans 8:1 became my lifeline: “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” This truth transformed my relationship with God, filling me with gratitude and a desire to help others find the same freedom.
Like the loving father in the parable of the Prodigal Son(s), your Heavenly Father is waiting for you to return to him with open arms. He has the ring of office ready for you and the mantle of sonship ready. Why? To cover up your sins so Jesus can’t see them anymore? No! Because that is the proper attire for a son our daughter of the King.
So why didn’t God just heal me from my pornography addiction when I asked him to? Great question, I am so glad you asked. Because God needed me to have a scar. This is the most profound aspect of this life you will ever come to understand. God wants experienced people in His kingdom to help others. If you need a plumber, which would you prefer: the most or the least experienced plumber available? Your freedom is not for you alone. God has a new purpose for you: to use what you learned to help others overcome what you overcame. “But, I am not qualified!” you might protest.
God doesn’t call the qualified. He qualifies the called.
No Condemnation
I cannot stress this point enough. For those struggling with pornography, it’s easy to feel condemned and hopeless. But the message of the gospel is one of grace, not shame. Romans 8:1 reminds us that in Christ, we are not condemned. His love is not based on our performance but on His finished work on the cross. Ask yourself this question: the Bible says there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus, so how much condemnation am I under in Christ Jesus? That’s right, none. If it is any more than none than God is a liar (spoiler alert: He is not).
Grace doesn’t just cover our sins; it empowers us to overcome them and then help others overcome theirs. It’s the power that broke my addiction to drugs, ultimately set me free from pornography, and then empowered me to help others. Even when I failed, God’s grace was there, inviting me to get back up and keep walking toward freedom.
I personally believe that the reason why God has no condemnation for us is His perspective on sin. Everyone’s addictions are a mechanism of medicating emotional pain. The emotional pain comes from the wounds that we receive from others (sins against us). This all occurred because of the fall of man. God knows that we are not just perpetrators of sin but we are also victims of it. Jesus came and lived a sinless life to end sin’s reign in the world and stop us from hurting each other. He did this by never sinning back in retribution to anyone that sinned against Him, even to the point of death on the cross. When we overcome addiction, we start to break the cycle of sin in the world and in doing so we start to act like Jesus.
A New Year, A New Beginning
As we step into the new year, I encourage you to reflect on your own life. Are there areas where you feel trapped? Secret sins that weigh you down? Know this: you are not alone, and you are not beyond hope. God’s grace is greater than your sin, and His power is sufficient to set you free.
Here are some practical steps to start your year porn-free:
Confess Your Struggle
Bring your addiction into the light. Whether it’s a trusted friend, spouse, pastor or counselor, confession is the first step toward freedom. James 5:16 says, “Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” I encourage you to confess it to the person who it is most detrimental for you to confess it to. Sharing it only with a brother or sister and not your spouse is still and act of hiding and shame.Seek Accountability
Join a support group or find an accountability partner who will walk with you in your journey. Having someone to encourage you and hold you accountable is invaluable. It is critical that you find one that does not use condemnation to shame you into righteousness. Righteousness is not possible apart from Christ and it is achieved not by human effort but by agreement with the truth. It is the truth that sets us free.
If you need accountability, I suggest two programs: The Conquer Series and Freedom in Christ. You can also feel free to contact me directly.Rely on God’s Strength
Overcoming addiction is not about willpower; it’s about surrendering to God’s power. Philippians 4:13 reminds us, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” Haven’t you already tried overcoming by your own strength? Let me guess: failure right? God is your true protector and no other is needed. The power to overcome derives from Him.Be Transformed by the Renewing of Your Mind
Your mind is neuroplastic. This means that you can literally change your mind. This typically takes 90 days. Commit to replacing the lies in your mind with truth for 90 days and to not use porn for that period of time. Start by getting rid of any pornography that you currently possess including any secret emails or logins you may have. Praise God every day of the 90 days by saying, “God, thank you for day ___ of freedom. Continue to help me renew my mind and overcome.”Replace Old Habits with New Ones
Fill the void left by pornography with activities that draw you closer to God. Spend time in prayer, study Scripture, and surround yourself with a community of believers. This will be difficult at first since you will likely not feel “worthy” to commune intimately with God. Do it anyway. Ask the Holy Spirit to reveal to you the truth of God’s grace and love for you. He will show you just how much He loves you.Embrace Grace
Remember that your identity is not defined by your past but by who you are in Christ. When you stumble, don’t stay down. Run to God, who is always ready to forgive and restore. On the path to overcoming porn, you will stumble and fail many times. The name “Israel” was given to Jacob after he wrestled with God. We as Christians are grafted into the nation of Israel. We all “wrestle” with God. God understands that and has limitless grace for us when we repent.
Conclusion
The new year offers a fresh start, a chance to leave behind the chains of pornography and step into the abundant life God has for you. My journey from addiction to freedom is a testament to the power of His grace. If He can set me free, He can do the same for you.
As you embark on this journey, know that you are not alone. God is with you, and His grace is sufficient. Let this year be the year you experience the joy of freedom, the restoration of relationships, and the closeness of walking with your Creator.
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